Question

Topic: E-Marketing

Marketers (preferably Sr) Is This Subtext Clear?

Posted by allix.berkman on 2/17/2017 at 3:29 PM ET 25 Points
Hi all!

We are hosting a marketing event called "Blurred," geared towards Senior level marketers, and have come up with a bit of subheader text for our website. I am wondering if the below is clear and concise.

"Today's marketer has unprecedented access to data and technology, but will never fully capitalize on this without CMOs rethinking traditional roles and processes within brands and agencies.
CMOs have a new partnership model to consider-one that includes marketers,agencies, and tech innovators.

Blurred is a learning experience about the new partnership paradigm. It peels back the layers of confusion around tech and helps marketers redefine existing roles, leverage the latest tech, and enhance their skillsets."

Also, a question for the group: what do you find that your biggest pain point is when it comes to the world of digital marketing?

Thanks for your input! :)
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  • Posted by Gary Bloomer on 2/17/2017 at 8:37 PM Accepted
    No. Omit the nonsense, MBA-speak "paradigm" and "leverage". Rewrite the first paragraph so that it contains at least two problems. Then rewrite the last paragraph so that it contains benefits and solutions to those problems.
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