In addition to borrowing the oft-used title above, I am using the insights of writers and listeners much more tuned into listening than am I -- including Swami Chinmayananda; Brenda Ueland, a prolific Minnesota author and columnist; and Terry Wildemann, CCSE, CPBA, Performance Consultant, Reiki Master, Image Plus. In saying this, I am admitting that I struggle with the Art of Listening. In my experience, I am in the majority.
Although listening has always been important in personal and business relationships, with the advent of Social Media we have the tools to do it more easily. It is particularly important for those business people who lead the heart, which always puts people ahead of products, services and profits, as listening is a primary factor in business success when that model is the foundation of a business.
When we lead from the heart, listening leads to innovation, creativity, quality products and services designed for people's wants and needs, and profits unattainable through any other business leadership model. When we don't lead from the heart, we likely don't care much about listening, because we care more about ourselves, profits and products and services. I have experienced the results of leading with your heart and listening both through my most successful clients and as a manager at such businesses as Starbucks.
Terry Wildemann tells us that, "Listening is an art that when done well delivers tremendous benefits. The goal of listening well is to achieve win-win communication. Win-win communication not only fosters understanding, affirmation, validation and appreciation, but it also creates an atmosphere of trust, honor and respect."
At the end of the day, making others feel special is one of the keys to building relationships. In life and in business, building relationships results in loyalty, and in business, loyalty results in increased sales, reduced marketing and sales costs, and brand evangelists building your business for you.
A few traits of good listeners are, according to Wildemann:
They often repeat the information he or she heard by saying, I hear you saying ... Is that correct?
They are curious and ask questions to ensure they are correctly hearing what is being said.
They want to listen.
They are physically and mentally present in the moment.
They use the ears to hear, the eyes to read body language, the mind to visualize the person speaking (when on the telephone), and intuition to determine what the speaker is actually saying.
They establish rapport by following the leader.
When we listen, creative juices flow within us as those we are listening to plant the seeds of new ideas. Imagine if we created opportunities through social media to hear what our customers, our employees and our communities thought about our business, our leadership, our business styles (ways of doing business), and our products and services.
With that information, we could make changes that would benefit our internal processes, cutting costs and waste and inspiring our employees to be passionate about what they do, enhancing productivity. We could improve the ways we serve our customers, encouraging their return because they want to experience us again and again. We could make products and offer services that we know customers want and need, putting us in a place where demand for what we do and what we sell rises to a place that maximizes our potential. We would be selling happiness instead of products and services, because we put people first.
Can you think of anyone who doesn't want happiness in their lives and in their possession?
"When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand. Ideas actually begin to grow within us and come to life. You know how if a person laughs at your jokes you become funnier and funnier, and if he does not, every tiny little joke in you weakens up and dies. Well, that is the principle of it. It makes people happy and free when they are listened to. And if you are a listener, it is the secret of having a good time in society (because everybody around you becomes lively and interesting), of comforting people, of doing them good," to quote Brenda Ueland. ( From a collection of her essays, "Strength To Your Sword Arm: Selected Writings by Brenda Ueland." Copyright 1992 by The Estate of Brenda Ueland.)
Swami Chinmayananda tells us that "We can learn a lot from every event in life. Just as the honeybee has the special instrument (proboscis) to extract the very essence in the flowers, human beings have a special faculty (power of discrimination) to maintain the quality of life by learning the art of true listening. Listening is the channel most often used for "learning." It is a vital communication function; it improves our ability of understanding, self-awareness and self-application." (Excerpted from his article called The Art of Listening.
Social Media is new to us. To date, I think we have made great progress in its use. The fact that companies such as Dell are experimenting with it to create a listening and business-improvement communications tool and that the Blog Council recently met to discuss its use, tells me we are making progress.
However, most of us continue to use it as a talking tool (one-way communications), evidenced by our blog posts, podcasts and vlogs. We need to do better. But two-way and 360-degree communication only happens if our readers and listeners choose to participate. That is our challenge, not theirs.
So, how do we create a communications environment, where listening takes place? I think that is the key question surrounding the use of Social Media and that dreaded acronym, ROI.
