Question

Topic: Copywriting

Headline Copy For Travel Startup

Posted by Anonymous on 9/29/2016 at 2:10 AM ET 250 Points
Target audience: Digital nomads - freelancers, entrepreneurs, remote workers

The idea: travel the world while working remotely in a community with other location independent professionals. Travel, connect, work

The startup does 2 things:
1) organized trips for digital nomads. We travel to 4 countries together (spending 1 month in each) while working remotely.
2) for those who prefer unstructured travel, we'll have communities in different cities that consist of a co-work and co-live space, and services (preloaded data sim card, metro/bus pass, organized activities). They can come and go as they please

The "communities + services" is how we'll differentiate ourselves from competitors who aren't organizing all the logistics of moving abroad as a remote worker.

I'm struggling to communicate that in the headline + subtitle. Currently I have "Travel the world. Work Remotely. Live in global communities"
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RESPONSES

  • Posted by mgoodman on 9/29/2016 at 3:27 PM Moderator
    The headline you have -- ""Travel the world. Work Remotely. Live in global communities." -- seems pretty good for your target audience. My sense is that it will get the right people to keep reading ... which is the objective, right? Be sure to have an image of a satisfied customer working in an exotic location. That image will do as much for you as the headline.
  • Posted on 9/29/2016 at 6:10 PM Author
    Thanks mrgoodman

    I had a few different communities critique the landing page however and many said the value wasn't communicated clearly enough. My web analytics also show that target audience spends around 2 seconds on the site, leading me to belief even that they only see the headline and then leave.
    I thought my headline communicated value but now I'm not sure so im wondering if there's better alternatives
  • Posted by Gary Bloomer on 9/29/2016 at 8:01 PM Member
    What is the primary benefit to potential clients of your service? What "writhing on the floor in agony" pain do you solve?
  • Posted on 9/29/2016 at 8:56 PM Author
    They get to travel in community of others just like them (digital nomad lifestlye is lonely) while working, and live untethered to a lease because as members they'll have access to living in any of our communities
  • Posted by Jay Hamilton-Roth on 9/29/2016 at 11:29 PM Accepted
    (Join) The World Travel Tribe
    Travel Globally. Work Remotely. Live Tribally.
  • Posted on 9/30/2016 at 4:13 AM Author
    KSA,

    Yes! That communicates it better than what I have. Condensing it to so few words but communicating the value has been really difficult

    Jay,

    I love that as well, thanks so much
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