A typical day in the life of the Frenchman family in Long Valley, NJ: This morning my son wakes up early to boot up my old PC in my office. Why? He now knows how to use a PC, fire up Internet Explorer (I know I have to get him on Firefox), and log on to his Webkinz account to play one of three Webkinz.


What's so special about logging on in the morning before school? Well, he figured out how to optimize his KinzCash earning power. You see, has to wait 8 hours between jobs so he can earn KinzCash in the morning and then take another job in the afternoon. He's a well oiled KinzCash earning machine, so of course my daughter wants to play too, but she can barely read right now.
Instead of letting her sleep in, he wakes her up so she can earn some KinzCash and this means she needs to use my wife's laptop. He helps her boot it up and log on to her Webkinz account. By the time he leaves for school, she is still online but she now lost her helper and needs to turn to my wife for support.
Unfortunately for Mary, her iPod is also attached so it can be charged for the day. Not only is it getting in my daughter's way, but as usual, it keeps popping up iTunes to let her know about all the good updates she needs. She can't unplug it because she needs to charge it, but my young daughter doesn't understand why this popup ad for iTunes (that's what it really is) is ruining her playtime.
So, who wins in the end between iPods and Webkinz? The iPod wins but not after my wife is sufficiently annoyed with iTunes. Besides, we count the time she spends on Webkinz as TV time and enough was enough.
However, before the iPod/Webkinz battle is finished, I found my wife sitting at the kitchen table with a phone book (yes, she had the waste of a paper weight in her well-manicured fingers) in her hands.
"Mary, what are you doing with a phone book?" I asked not realizing a power struggle is raging in my den.
"I'm looking for a gym nearby so our daughter can try a new gym. Oh wait, here I found it. Can you wait a sec hon?" she answered back as she went to dial the phone. "Hi, I'm looking to sign up my daughter for a gym...err, what? You aren't a gym? Oh, I'm sorry I have the wrong number."
"Mary, why don't you just Google it (note proper use of the word) instead of wasting your time with that novel?"
"I can't. Oh wait a second, I dialed the wrong number. Here it goes. 'Yes, hi, my daughter would like to take a test class to see if she likes your gym.... No, she isn't 6 yet, but wait isn't this the same gym that Jane Smith takes a class?... No?... Oh, that's a different location. Do you have the number for that location? Great. Thanks.'" Mary finally hangs up the phone and quietly curses the phone book.
"See I told you, you should have Googled it. Why did you waste your time with..." Before, I can finish my question that would have ended sarcastically, Mary interrupts and yells....
"Look, I can't use my laptop because your daughter is on Webkinz and she needs help. Plus, every two minutes iTunes pops up over her screen which drives her crazy. She can't minimize it and it continues to pop up to let me know about some new song I could care less about. So, don't come downstairs to tell me to Google it. We've got Webkinz, iPods, and Yellow Pages..."
Oh my....
Eric